just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
