Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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