Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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