After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
