so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
