What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
