GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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