I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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