Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
