Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
