I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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