ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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