My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Randomize
