happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
