She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
