i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Can't talk, ducks in the car
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
