She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
