I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
