she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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