Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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