I'm really into asian looking animals
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
