Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
