I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Randomize
