I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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