It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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