it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
