Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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