can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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