I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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