I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
