I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
