She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
