What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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