Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(360): View more from Washington

Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!

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(773): View more from Illinois

You're such a slut.

(318): View more from Louisiana

I prefer opportunist.

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(607): View more from New York

you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later

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(917): View more from New York City

Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.

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(503): View more from Oregon

He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you

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(919): View more from North Carolina

she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game

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(314): View more from Missouri

Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.

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(574): View more from Indiana

Paige is home safe.

(574): View more from Indiana

Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)

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