he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize
