This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Panties = found
Randomize
