Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
