I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize