The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
