watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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