I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
