just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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