How'd it feel making her break her religion?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
