The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
