he shaved USA in his pubs
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
