She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I need water and some morals
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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