well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
