yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
