uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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