She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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