I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Randomize
