You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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