So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize